January 27, 2015

In Less Then 24 Hours I Will Be Sleeved


 
Tomorrow is MY day.  My surgery is at 7:30 in the morning which is good because waiting all day would be so much harder.  I just want them to whisk me back before I know what is happening. 
 
Yesterday was a really bad day for me.  I was tired because I could not sleep the night before, having surgery coming up makes it hard to calm your mind. I was starving, it was day 9 and I'm not sure why I was so, so hungry.  I think all the artificial sugar in Jello, Popsicles and sugar free Gaterade makes it harder and makes you way more hungry.  I was just an emotional mess, tired, hungry and scared.  I have this fear that I will fail to lose weight or that I will gain it back, which scares the hell out of me.  Then I ate some chicken broth and things got a little better. 
 
However, something happened today, I woke up feeling great.  I felt like my world was moving in the right direction.  It was the weirdest thing.  I was calm and at peace.  Hopefully I will feel that way tomorrow too.  I know this is the right decision for not only me but for my children too. I just have to have faith that this is my time to take care of me and that everything will workout great.   

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