Tomorrow is MY day. My surgery is at 7:30 in the morning which is good because waiting all day would be so much harder. I just want them to whisk me back before I know what is happening.
Yesterday was a really bad day for me. I was tired because I could not sleep the night before, having surgery coming up makes it hard to calm your mind. I was starving, it was day 9 and I'm not sure why I was so, so hungry. I think all the artificial sugar in Jello, Popsicles and sugar free Gaterade makes it harder and makes you way more hungry. I was just an emotional mess, tired, hungry and scared. I have this fear that I will fail to lose weight or that I will gain it back, which scares the hell out of me. Then I ate some chicken broth and things got a little better.
However, something happened today, I woke up feeling great. I felt like my world was moving in the right direction. It was the weirdest thing. I was calm and at peace. Hopefully I will feel that way tomorrow too. I know this is the right decision for not only me but for my children too. I just have to have faith that this is my time to take care of me and that everything will workout great.
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