I Work Out......

I went to the gym this morning, yeah me. I did an hour of aerobic jazz. I feel great. I wish I could bottle this feeling up and remember it when I don't feel like going to the gym. Here's my hot sweaty mess of a face.

Weigh in Friday

So yesterday.....let's talk about it.  I ate way too much, I believe there was a chocolate- chocolate chip muffin and a chocolate bar both involved in the debauchery that took place yesterday.   I weighed myself in the morning after TWO whole days of eating within my calories and I hadn't lost any weight.  I was so mad, I ate.  It was not one of my better moments.

However, something great happened.  I decided to go to the gym and take an aerobics class, beginners aerobic jazz.  It was so much fun, everyone in the class was nice and supportive but most importantly I could do it.  I was worried I would not be able to keep up or even finish, I was able to do both, yeah me!  I forgot how much I enjoy working out.   I forgot how good your body and mind feel after.  I think I am the kind of girl who likes to exercise in a class, which is strange because I am shy and not very social.  For my weight, My Fitness Pal says if I do 60 minute of low impact aerobics I burn 750 calories, doesn't that seem high?

I decided to weigh in every Friday and try really, really hard not to go near the scale on any other day.  I figure Fridays are good in case I indulge in a little wine over the weekend.  I am trying to be realistic and make realistic lifestyle changes which means I can not give up a couple of glasses of wine on the weekends. 


March 29, 2013                     331.0 lbs      Ugh, my highest weigh since I was pregnant.


Why is posting your real, actual weight such an frightening act?  I hope nobody I know see this.
I guess like Oprah says, "I need to live in my truth". 

Baby, It's Cold Out Outside.....

It is still very cold her in Western New York.  The snow is so beautiful but it gets really old when you are ready to get outside.  However, this cold weather keeps reminding me how much I need want this wool coat on Etsy.  It is really hard to find stylish coats in plus sizes.  Plus I just love the orange color. 

Day 1

Day 1, that sounds so intimidating but not has intimidating as posting pictures of yourself, ugh. I'm not going to focus on how many days I have to go. I guess I have the rest of my life to work on myself and learn and making lasting changes.

I don't think I ate enough especially fruits and vegetables but I'm not hungry so its fine for today. It's kind of hard to figure out calories too. I think my salad for dinner was more calories then I put in My Fitness Pal.

Also, I was going to go the gym, the one I signed up for but have yet to go, but my son had a tennis game so I couldn't get to the gym. I went for a walk instead, however it wasn't much of a walk because it was colder out then I thought. I was kind of disappointed in myself.

I kind of feel like I don't know what I am doing.

Note to self....don't let kids take pictures anymore, find someone taller or make them stand on the couch.

So True

                        via

If at First You Don't Succeed.......

I was laying in bed last night thinking about my life.  How did I get here? Where do I want to be?  Then it hit me, didn't I start a weight loss blog last year?  Wasn't I so excited for a new beginning?  I was, but that excitement died, I gave up.  Like most people, I have been through a lot these past few years.  I have lost and regained about 40 pounds in the past 4 years and because of this I feel not only guilty but uncomfortable in my own body.  I feel weak in so many ways and I hate this feeling.  I have to change it it because it creates this emotionally and physically unhealthy cycle in my everyday life.

 I thought about deleting my old post from over a year ago but I wanted to remind myself that I don't want another year to go by without making changes.  I often think about weight loss surgery but it isn't the right option for me right now for various reasons.   

Such a large part of my life revolves around food, I love to cook, I love to entertain, I love to bake goodies for my children and friends but most of all I love to eat. 

My goal is to slowly change my cooking skills, habits and lifestyle into a more healthier, long term solution.

I find reading weight loss blogs not only inspirational but also helpful. I hope by having a place to record my journey, it will help me be accountable to myself and give me the motivation to succeed.

So here I go again on my own.......